Parents encourage children to master five skills
Encouraging children is a great way to educate, but not all praise will have a positive effect.
Do you know how to praise your baby?
There are five tips you can refer to.
Compliment the child in several scenarios. Analysis scenario 1: Baby draws a picture. Xiao Zhe likes to paint. At home, every time Xiao Zhe draws a picture, he will show it to his mother. In order to encourage Xiao Zhe, the mother always behavesIt ‘s easy, “Baby, you draw so well!
“” This is the most beautiful painting I have ever seen!
After hearing her mother’s praise, Xiaozhe always left with satisfaction.
But over time, Xiao Zhe’s painting skills have not grown, and she is very reluctant to hear different opinions. If the mother behaves a little bit occasionally, Xiao Zhe will cry and make trouble.
The mother was very upset. The parenting book repeatedly praised the good child. She did the same. Why didn’t she get a satisfactory result?
Analysis: The praise of vague and exaggerated facts, it sounds like there is a sense of satisfaction, but it ca n’t stand scrutiny, it is easy for the baby to become conceited, thinking that he is the best, and slowly, it is difficult to accept other voices,In particular, some suggestions are insufficient to make the baby gradually unable to fight, but become more vanity and like to listen to good words.
Praise is better in this way: no matter if the baby is handmade or painting, when he presents the work in front of his mother, there are specific things, and the mother should look at his work carefully before looking for praise.
For example, the colors of the baby are used very well, and the birds are painted very well. If you can give some relevant comments, such as “If you pay attention to the color more evenly next time, it is even better.
“Patient and meticulous praise will make the baby feel that his mother is very worthy of his work. Therefore, he will be particularly happy and strengthen his shortcomings. This is effective praise, so that he improves, not conceit.
Scene 2: The baby was rewarded. Because Lele’s overall performance in the class is very good, she won the title of quarterly outstanding baby in the kindergarten. The kindergarten has issued a small certificate and a beautiful little gift. Lele MomQuanle Lele praised, “Baby, I know you are the best kid.
“” There must be no children in your class who can do well with you. ”
You must keep it, but don’t be naughty again.
“But Lele is not happy. Xiaoying is also an excellent baby. Is she better than me?
Lele’s cross-examination made her mother unable to answer, and she had to say that she was just as good as you.
Lele wouldn’t let it go, mom, you obviously said I was the best.
My mother is a little angry, but just praises you, why are you so competitive?
Analysis: When the baby’s performance has been affirmed, the praise of the mother needs to be more cautious. If the mother is only immersed in ecstasy and casually saying some uncomfortable praise, it may make the baby doubt the mother’s honesty.In the mother’s eyes, she became an unbeatable child in the class. In fact, there are still many children who perform as well as her. This is even clear to the baby. How can a confused mother turn a blind eye?
This praise will be better: when the baby’s performance is praised by the teacher, you can communicate with the teacher first to understand the specific progress of the baby in some aspects, and then share the baby’s performance.Waiting for the details, the baby will see his progress, but also understand the lack of knowledge, it will stimulate the baby’s competitive spirit, and do better next time.
Note: Only share your child’s specific progress.
If the child does not talk about other children, do n’t ask, everyone only needs to compare with themselves; why not mention the child ‘s deficiencies (unless the situation is more serious), when the child is making progress, discuss the child ‘s deficiencies, and treat the childIt is often disappointing.
Scenario 3: When the baby and the mother share success, the COCO won the first place in the class when the rope skipping competition was held in the kindergarten.
After mother got off work, COCO couldn’t wait to share her victory with her mother.
However, my mother was busy cooking, but just a little bit: “I knew you could do well.
Seeing COCO’s expression of disappointment, Mom added: “You are great.
“However, COCO still has a list of toys in distress and went to watch TV on his own.
For her, praise from her mother is just a synonym for telling her not to disturb her mother’s cooking.
Analysis: Timely and enthusiastic, the praise in place will stimulate the baby’s effect, or exaggerate, or indifferent, will make the baby’s joy less than half, so the mother needs to pay attention to praise the baby’s tone and manner, otherwise there will be adverse effects.
This praise will be better: when the baby actively shares with the mother, when the mother is busy, you can let the baby wait, or stop the work at hand, listen to her carefully about the game process, or ask her questions.
“You want to play against more than 30 students in your class, aren’t you nervous?
“Knowing her playing process will make your baby’s pride more real.
Timely praise is three years more effective than delaying enthusiasm.
Five Tips for Praising Your Child Looking at the above examples, we can see that parents praise their children in a very important way.
In fact, people lack the ability to self-evaluate before the age of 3, and gradually have a prototype of self-evaluation until the age of 7.
During this period, basically when an adult says what a child is, he thinks of himself.
Therefore, parents have a great responsibility to help their children build good self-awareness.Motivation is the best way for children to have a healthy self-awareness. If an adult always denies a child, he will have a self-suggestion of “I’m stupid, I can’t do it” since childhood, and the child’s potential will be disturbed.
Praise is the core method for cheering on a child when he or she makes a “right” behavior. When a child’s behavior is “right”, parents must praise in time to fix the child’s behavior and make him re-energize in the future.
Every day, every week, children will always have good behaviors or get good results. Parents should praise them in time.
For a child, being praised means being recognized, his self-worth will rise, and his self-confidence will increase.
A positive evaluation of a child who has a positive psychological experience provides a good stimulating effect; a negative evaluation makes a child unhappy, which may lead to problems, work hard to correct, and substitutes may weaken self-confidence and generate inferiority.
Anyone’s desire for affirmation greatly exceeds that of negation. Therefore, parents should insist on the education method based on praise and encouragement.
Five praise techniques worthy of parents’ attention: 1.
When praising a child, don’t just stare at studying one aspect of the child’s character, civilization, politeness, labor performance, hands-on ability, hygiene habits, etc., all can be evaluated. Parents consider it wide, it is not difficult to find the content of praise.
The focus is on praising the process, not the outcome.
What a parent praises shows an expert, and the child can correct it.
In the process of learning, pay attention to whether the child is attentive, whether there are some “created” discoveries, whether they can raise interesting, quality questions, whether they can come up with unique methods . these are more important than the results,It is worth parents to discover and praise.
Praise the child needs to set a reasonable standard to look at the child with a developmental perspective. As long as you observe carefully, you will find that he has improved every day.
Basically compare the child’s own progress, and do not take the best aspects of other children as a reference, and compare them horizontally with the child.
This is not to lower the standards of children, because that ratio is not objective and unrealistic, and it will not have a better effect than hitting children’s self-confidence.
Through objective comparison, while discovering the shortcomings, we must also affirm the advantages, so that we will not be biased, the child will be convinced, and maintain his confidence while motivating his upward motivation.
The form of praise can be various. Parents can take verbal praise, gesture action praise, written praise and material encouragement. Depending on the characteristics of the child and the content of the praise, try to let the praise make the best use of the incentive function.
Praise specifically, the easier it is for a child to understand a certain good behavior, the easier it is to find the direction of effort. For example, after the child reads the book, he puts the book back in place and arranges it neatly.
If the parents just say, “You are doing well today.
“The praise effect will be greatly reduced, because the child does not understand what” good “means.
You can say, “I’m so glad you packed your books so neatly!
And some general praises, such as “You are smart”, “You are awesome”, etc. Although the child’s self-confidence can be improved for the time being, but the child does not understand where he is, and why it is easy to be proudCan’t listen to bad habits of criticism.