Interpretation of the love ban on smart wives

Interpretation of the love ban on smart wives

Don’t say, “I know you will say that.

And to say, “You’ve said this before, so it must still be filling you.

“There are a lot of words that don’t cause trouble unless you use a sandy tone.

When you are ridiculous: “I know you will say that”, it is tantamount to calling your husband another “dumb, idiot” in another way.

The creator of the Gottman Institute in Seattle, USA, and the author of “The 7 Rules of Marriage,” John Doctor of Philosophy?

Gutman believes that scorn will accelerate the breakdown of the marriage.

One of the most obvious signs of a divorce is that no matter what your husband says, you dismiss it.

  The wise expression is: “You have said this before, so it must still be disturbing you.

“In this way, sincerely consider his feelings and show that you want to do something to solve the problem.

Trying to experience and communicate your marriage to each other in your life is a little bit closer to each other.

Gutman advised: “If he has to work late to get home late, it doesn’t prevent him from cataloging his favorite TV festivals.

Only when you really understand each other’s goals, fears, and hopes, and when major events and divisions need to be decided, can you treat them better together.

“Don’t say,” You’re driving me crazy.

And to say, “I really feel bad about you doing that.

“You need to be clear about what is affecting your emotions. Olson, Ph.D., professor of family sociology and professor of family sociology at St. Paul University of Minnesota, believes that negating everything in general will only make the marriage relationship even more tense.

  You need to be expert on how his actions make you feel, but don’t make a large list of repetitions and grievances.

Remember: point out only one problem at a time, such as, “When I want to talk to you and you only care about watching TV, it really makes me uncomfortable.

“The sooner you say your feelings at the time, the better.

Dr. Olson explained that the phrase “you are driving me crazy” means that your emotions have risen to an excessive level after continuous depression.

  Don’t say, “You’ve never done this right.

And you have to say, “You have done a lot of hard work, but isn’t it too laborious in this way?”

“Blame your other half for misbehaving, and you often point out the right and wrong ways to do it.

Although it may seem like your method is the best, in fact it often comes with your subjective preferences.

Dr. Gutman pointed out: “Responsibility is hard to alienate couples.

“Two people in the family must be equal. Dr. Gutman imitates that when it is time to do housework, men must abandon the idea of making themselves comfortable; and women have to abandon the process of controlling men to do this.
“Obviously, being a consultant is better than pointing at him.

“Don’t skimp on his gratitude and affirmations, it will make him happy to continue.

Happy couples are often based on appreciation of each other, and they often praise each other, even in the most subtle places in the home, they will not forget to say thank you.

  Don’t say, “Why don’t you always listen to me?

“And to say,” This is really important to me.

“Saying your partner doesn’t always listen to your multiple blame and exaggerates.

After all, even the most modest person cares about what you say a few times.

Professor of Sociology, Washington University, Seattle, USA, author of the book “Love in Equality: How to Really Make Marriage Equal”, Ph.D.

Schwartz pointed out: Using words like “always” or “never”, your husband “is unlikely to have a normal conversation with you right now.”

At the same time, this total negative statement also puts the responsibility of the problem on him, and separates all the related parties.

  Start with the phrase “This is really important to me” in order to open the door to a progressive conversation for you.

According to Schwartz, “It will give you the opportunity to say what he has refused and make suggestions for solving the problem.

“Be calm when expressing your point.Professor of Psychology, University of Denver, author of “Fighting for Marriage: Avoiding Divorce and Making Love Last”, Dr. Heward, PhD?

Dr. Mackman believes that usually the biggest rejection of a wife to her husband is that they do not tell you at all; but the most consistent view of husbands is that talking too much will cause disputes.

He therefore suggested that if you want your husband to listen to you and communicate more with you, you must always be calm.

  Don’t say, “You’re right, I want to leave you!

“And to say,” That gives me a feeling of wanting to leave you.

“Threats may sound compelling, but they are often dangerous and leave little room for further conversation.

Dr. Schwartz explained: “Your husband may say ‘goodbye’ to you or ridicule you for nothing more than doing something, and both of these results are a shame on you.

“Even if you do get angry, your relationship will not end there, especially if it involves your child.

  Keep those impulse impulse in mind, after all, you “do not really want to leave” and look for ways to communicate about it.

In this case, as long as the relationship between the couple has not broken down, speaking out the true feelings helps to reach the root of the problem.

However, for most marriages, leaving threats at every turn can only change the time shift and become a reality.

Gutman explained: “It’s kind of trying to commit suicide, always threatening people who are going to divorce to push their future path a little bit into a corner.

“Don’t say,” Nothing wrong.

What makes you feel wrong?

And to say, “Yes, some things are really problematic.

“Avoiding problems will only make things worse.

Wounds will always get purulent, and your pain will abandon your relationship to a more chaotic situation and gradually deepen.

  First, admit that there is something wrong, until you are not ready to re-emerge immediately.

This will help remove tension and bring both of you on the same path to finding a solution.

Then plan (the next night or this weekend) and everyone sits down and carefully participates in both sides’ issues.

  It is wise to solve the problem before going to bed.

But Markman pointed out that if there is a serious conflict between the two parties, “it is not appropriate to force one of these troubles before going to bed.

“He suggests setting aside grievances temporarily until you find a time to deal with the problem.

When you feel less tired and tired, it will be easier to find solutions to your problems.

  Don’t say, “You always favor children.

“Instead,” Parents as a whole need to be more unified.

“The word” always “is a red word of danger, full of controversy and often causing anger.

And your husband will also be in a defensive state because of this, armed himself to wait for the “World War I”.

  Even if you do get angry, your relationship will not end there, especially if it involves your child.
  Keep those impulse impulse in mind, after all, you “do not really want to leave” and look for ways to communicate about it.
In this case, as long as the relationship between the couple has not broken down, speaking out the true feelings helps to reach the root of the problem.
However, for most marriages, leaving threats at every turn can only change the time shift and become a reality.

Gutman explained: “It’s kind of trying to commit suicide, always threatening people who are going to divorce to push their future path a little bit into a corner.

“Don’t say,” Nothing wrong.

What makes you feel wrong?
And to say, “Yes, some things are really problematic.

“Avoiding problems will only make things worse.

Wounds will always get purulent, and your pain will abandon your relationship to a more chaotic situation and gradually deepen.

  First, admit that there is something wrong, until you are not ready to re-emerge immediately.

This will help remove tension and bring both of you on the same path to finding a solution.Then plan (the next night or this weekend) and everyone sits down and carefully participates in both sides’ issues.

  It is wise to solve the problem before going to bed.
But Markman pointed out that if there is a serious conflict between the two parties, “it is not appropriate to force one of these troublesome thoughts before going to bed”.

“He suggests setting aside grievances temporarily until you find a time to deal with the problem.
When you feel less tired and tired, it will be easier to find solutions to your problems.

  Don’t say, “You always favor children.
“Instead,” Parents as a whole need to be more unified.

“The word” always “is a red word of danger, full of controversy and often causing anger.

And your husband will also be in a defensive state because of this, armed himself to wait for the “World War I”.